“Your greatest reward always comes after your greatest fight”. I remember the day I first saw that quote, I was on my way home from summer lesson, and there was this semi-trailer truck with the quote at the back. It was an aha moment for me, and since I love sharing, I alerted my friends to think deep with me. Needless to say, they didn’t care about some quote behind a truck, especially under the scorching sun. I took this message with me, and it has comforted me at my darkest moments. The one time I remember applying this was when I was still a pretty solid gamer, I always looked forward to the tough battles; you know the ones you have to replay 2 or 3 times before you get right. I knew that to move to the next level, I would need to defeat someone “stronger” than the last guy, and I carried that mentality with me. I grew up always looking forward to every battle because I knew my reward would be worth the pain. Tonight, I decided to share my seven steps to win every fight. I don’t know where you need to apply this, but I’m pretty sure you’ll need it sometime in your life. Everything begins with courage, and so the first step is doing it afraid.
Do It Afraid: I’m pretty sure we have all at some point in our lives, taken a leap of faith and done something we thought would overwhelm us. Well, I remember one time I fought my best friend in secondary school. You know how they say, “you’re not friends until you fight”, well I took that seriously, and decided I had to cement my friendship with Nsikak. I can’t remember what happened but I know I initiated the fight, and even though I was scared that he might beat me, I did it anyway. I did it scared, and yes he beat the doubt out of me, but I take solace in the fact that we became even better friends after that. Maybe not the best example to share but you get the point right? To do anything worthwhile in life, you have to do it afraid.
Tell A Story: I don’t know if you know this about me, but I love telling stories. Apart from the fact that I love sharing bits of myself with the world, I tell stories because I love planning and creating to the end. In that same way, you must be willing to tell yourself the story of how it will end. Here’s why it’s essential, “we become what we think about “. Another reason you need to have your story well thought out is that whoever controls the story controls the narrative and your life will be shot or produced according to the script or story you have told yourself. If you see a future full of love, life, success, wins and laughter in your story then I assure you, that is what you will attract. If you see otherwise…Tell yourself some victory stories today.
Know Your Target/Audience: Knowing your target is something I teach every day in my marketing masterclass. The reason you have to tell yourself the story is that it helps you figure out who your characters are. Who is at the other end of the rope? Who are you doing this for? Who stands to benefit more if you win? What is your goal? How will you get there? Who do you need on your journey? I don’t know how else to explain this but don’t be a wandering generality, you need to plan to the end, and identify precisely what you think you’ll need to win.
Get Attention: This one I’m scared of sharing. When I was in jss1, I liked this girl. She was pretty attractive, and I wanted her to be my girlfriend, only problem was I wasn’t the only one that thought she was beautiful. There were a few of us and to “win”, I knew I had to get attention, I had to stand out from the other guys. Of course, I took it too far and signed up to perform West life’s fool again in front about 2000 students, even though I knew I wasn’t born with the talent to sing. I did get the attention I sought, but it wasn’t for a good reason. Whatever you need to do, get attention. Put the spotlight on you because there are other people want the same thing, and the only way to win is if you’re the centre of attention. An excellent way to start is by doing the work and doing it well enough to stand out.
Don’t Be Boring: I hate being boring. Whenever I do a presentation, whether it’s an academic presentation, business pitch or just hanging out with the guys, the one thing I always avoid as much as possible is not being interesting. This need for being the interesting one started in secondary school because I believe that is where peer pressure starts. While all my friends had amazing physical talents that could be easily appreciated, I had to fight to keep the spotlight on myself, so I became the funny guy. At the time I thought I was the funny guy because to be fair, I did make a lot of people laugh, and sometimes it came at an expense. The lesson is once you have the attention, make sure you don’t bore them, or they will lose interest.
Be Patient. We live in a generation where everything is shared online, and so we do a lot of comparing and contrasting. Social media has made us forget that it takes a long time to settle something big. The science students will relate to this; I learnt patience during chemistry practicals. I didn’t love titration very much because of the time and precision required. I would always want to rush through mine, and I noticed that most times, rushing through only gave me the wrong outcome. I had to learn to do my titration drop by drop and that taught me something about patience, you may have done the work but be patient, the reward will come. You know what’s worse than losing a fight you’ve been looking forward to? Losing because you don’t how long it will last. LET YOUR SEED GERMINATE.
Rest: I can’t emphasise this enough, but I’ll try. I’m an addict. I’m addicted to the grind; I always want to work and test how far my body and spirit can go. About a month ago, I had a burnout, and it wasn’t the first. Burnouts usually come with depression, and it’s worse when you’ve fought with all your strength, and you’ve done all the work you think you can, and it still feels like you’ve done nothing. It’s easy to feel worthless and give up but really, what you need to do is rest. Sometimes your strategy is what is wrong, and you need to look at it with fresh eyes. After doing the work and it looks like nothing is happening, take a rest and start again from the top. In case you’ve gotten to that point or you know someone that has, I wrote about how to fight depression HERE.
I don’t know about you, but I’m going to confront my battles head-on. You may not have asked for yours, but if you want to win, start afraid. Let me know, do you have any questions or contributions. Is there a step you use, and you’d like to share, reach me on theaniekanumana@gmail.com or leave a comment and we’ll have a productive conversation.
